Life as a Widower

John Jacob never remarried after his wife died.  I often wonder what leads a person to remarry or stay single after a spouse passes away.  He lived 27 years as a widower.  At his own funeral service, it was said that “He missed greatly the association of his mate that he loved and lived with for many years.  He lived alone for some 27 years, but he never lost that love or lost sight of that smiling face that lived with him.”


During those years as a widower, I imagine he had lots of time to spend with his posterity.  In 1932, he sold his property and moved to Bozeman, Montana.  Here are a few photos from his later years.


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Work, Homes, and Children

Over the next several years after John and Lizzie married, John Jacob worked as a hostler, a clerk, and a stableman.  The City Directory show that he worked as a clerk for the Grand Union Tea Company in 1898.   And the 1899 city directory shows that he is a clerk for the H. Y. H. Tea Co.  Did the tea company change names?  No, the manager, John M. Young, of the Grand Union Tea Company resigned in 1899, becoming a partner in the H. Y. H. Tea and Coffee store. John must have been a good employee for the Grand Union Tea Company because it appears he left the company and went to work for Mr. Young and the H. Y. H. Tea Co. when it opened. John Jacob must have been recruited by the manager to leave the company and follow him to the new store.  Interestingly, the new company enjoyed a profitable business for two years and then closed up.  Mr. Young then returned to the Grand Union Tea Company as manager. (Source: Biographical Annals of Lancaster County, Pennsylvania)

Here’s a photo I found online of the Grand Union Tea Company store in Lancaster, PA.

grand union tea company store lancaster

You can read more about the Grand Union Tea Company, and see some great photos, at

The 1900 Census lists John Jacob’s occupation as Hostler. The 1903 City Directory shows that he is a driver. And the 1910 Census shows that he is a stableman. According to an obituary written by his granddaughter Joy, he drove drey for the Tea Co. and the Hershey Candy Co.  So it’s possible that instead of a clerk, he was a driver/hostler.  Later, before the family moved to Montana, John lived on a farm and grew tobacco, a very common crop of the time.  More info about John’s employment after moving to Montana will be shared in later posts.

Jacob and Lizzie seemed to move frequently.  Remember they married at the end of 1887, and they stated on the marriage license that they were both from Whitmer.  Here are their homes as listed in the City Directories over the next few years:

  • 1890-Whitmer
  • 1896-Rockland (possibly with John’s father)
  • 1897-31 N Arch
  • 1898-21 Hazel
  • 1899-216 N Arch; John’s brother Harry is listed at the same home
  • 1903–522 Dauphin; John’s brother Luther is listed at the same home
  • 1905-601 Rockland
  • 1907–Not listed in Lancaster City
  • 1911–725 N Christian

I love that Pennsylvania still has so many old homes in use today.  Some of the homes where John and Lizze lived have since been demolished and replaced with parking lots or other structures.  But here are some photos of homes they lived in that are still in use today.


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Amidst the various jobs and homes, their family grew as children were born.

  • Roy ‘E’–born and died in Aug 1888
  • Esther Mae–Born 19 Oct 1889
  • John Solomon–Born 13 Jul 1891
  • Hirom Franklin–Born 19 Dec 1893
  • Amos Lester–Born 3 Mar 1895
  • Sarah Alberta–Born 3 Dec 1896
  • Edgar Elwood–Born Oct 1898 and died 1900
  • Emma Margie–Born 30 Sep 1900
  • Theodore Apple–Born 3 Apr 1904
  • Violet Amelia–Born 26 Nov 1906

Names are interesting.  Generally, children were named after family members, or the doctor who delivered the child.  If the child was the first baby delivered by a doctor, the child often received the doctor’s name.  Of course there are exceptions, or naming after friends, or famous people.  John Jacob himself is likely named after each of his grandfathers–John Parmer and Jacob B. Eckman.  I found a reference that said traditional naming, during that time period, of children is a follows:

  1. First son is named after father’s father
  2. Second son is named after mother’s father
  3. Third son is named after father
  4. Fourth son is named after father’s eldest brother


  1. First daughter is named afer mother’s mother
  2. Second daughter is named after father’s mother
  3. Third daughter is named after mother
  4. Fourth daughter is named after mother’s eldest sister

I like to look at families to see how much they followed this traditional naming.  So let’s look at John J.’s family. We’ll start with the sons.

Their first child, Roy, died shortly after birth.  I don’t see the name “Roy” in any family names.  So perhaps he was named after the doctor.  Yet it’s interesting to note that John J.’s brother, William, who was just 1.5 years younger than John J., named his oldest son Roy.  Could it be there is a family member we don’t know about?  Or did William name his son after John’s deceased child?  Or did they use the same doctor?  Something to think about for sure!

Their third child is named John Solomon.  John, of course, was a very common name, so determining who John Solomon was named after can be tricky, but it definitely doesn’t follow the traditional naming pattern.  None of John’s children are named after his father, Samuel.  But John Solomon seems to combine the traditional 2nd and 3rd son naming into one name.  John is the name of John Jacob’s grandfather, as noted earlier, as well as Lizzie’s grandfather, John C. Diffenderfer.  So John Solomon could have been named after them, or after his father, John Jacob.  Solomon is the name of Lizzie’s father, Solomon Rutt Ebersole.  So the middle name is easy to trace.

The next three boys–Hirom Franklin, Amos Lester, and Edgar Elwood–could be named after someone or could be just common names of the time.  There are a few Amos’s in the family–Lizzie has a brother named Amos and John J.’s sister married an Amos.  And John J. has a brother whose middle name is Elwood.  I’d be interested in seeing a birth certificate for them to see if they are named after their doctors.  That is what happened with the youngest son, Theodore Apple.  He was named after the doctor who delivered him.

Moving to the daughters, John J.’s second child, Esther, is likely named after his mother, Hetty.  Hetty is a nickname for Esther, which is what Hetty’s given name was.  So they skipped naming the first daughter after the mother’s mother, which would have been Sarah, but they did name the second daughter Sarah.  So they flipped the traditional order for their first two daughters.

Their third daughter is Emma Margie.  Emma was one of Lizzie’s sisters.  Lizzie was the oldest daughter in her family.  Emma was the next oldest.  So it’s likely that they skipped naming a daughter after Lizzie and went to the mother’s eldest sister in the traditional naming pattern.  Emma’s middle name is Margie, which is John J.’s oldest sister.  So Emma Margie is named after her two oldest aunts.

The youngest child, and last daughter, is Violet Amelia.  I’m not sure where Violet comes from, but Amelia is one of Lizzie’s youngest sisters, who were twins-Ella and Amelia. So a traditional pattern is mostly followed for John and Lizzie’s daughters.  Knowing this traditional naming pattern can sometimes help in family history research.

We don’t have a lot of information about their life in Pennsylvania, but we do have a little.  Be sure to read the next post for those details.